I cannot say that I truly know what sisters are supposed to be. Shadows of one another? Punching bags? Mothers? Friends? Enemies? I really don’t know.
I do know what my sister is. Not blood. And halleluia for that! We can’t compare love or attention. We can’t dread holidays or funerals. We won’t argue about furniture. We can just be. Because we choose to just be together.
Yeah, we get frustrated with one another. But since we’re not blood there’s no obligation to make it right. The basic freedom of choice to be with one another is enough to keep us both coming back. Because we want to.
We can choose our family. And I choose my sister. Because I want to be with her. Not because I have to be with her.
It is my sincere wish that our daughters grow together absent of competition for our love and attention and with the understanding that they are all welcome in our home and in our hearts. If they choose to be. Not because they owe us anything.
Because they won’t owe us. The charge to care for and rear them in admonition for God is a charge given to us by God through the nature He created. And we have that nature – the nature to nurture. We’ve not allowed, not chosen, to pass on that charge in lieu of our own interests. And In lieu of the psychobabble of modern thinking that says we must be loved. Or must be respected. We mustn’t. And so they won’t owe us their love and attention. They will hopefully choose to love and be with us and one another.
Because life is a series of choices. Even for sisters.